Monthly Archives: February 2010

Facebook Update

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Facebook Update

FEb10-4Relationships are hard enough.  What makes relationships even more difficult is the popularity of Facebook!  I remember when I first set up my FB profile – birthday, work location, favorite tv shows etc. Then they asked for status.  At that time I contently checked single.

Then last year I got in a relationship with someone.  I was ecstatic to meet someone that I was compatible with and happy to have a mate.  But, then that awkward conversation came.  No, it wasn’t who would move where.  It wasn’t how long to wait before meeting each other’s family.  It wasn’t even about pressing the toothpaste from the bottom or the middle.  It was about updating our FB status.  Should we?  Shouldn’t we?  Hmmmm….. We finally decided to change our status to “In a relationship” – big things were happening in FB-land.

The congrat messages were posted on my wall.  People wanted to know more information about the guy.  One friend even called and was upset that he had to find out I was in a relationship as opposed to me telling him first!

So, the year carried on and guy and I did some great things together.   Pics of our events were posted on my page.  He was tagged.  I was tagged.  Life was great.

And then we broke up.  When it happened I didn’t go and boast and brag about it to people.  He and I remained friends and continued to talk. But then I realized one thing – I had to change my Facebook status!  I didn’t want everyone to see “Michelle went from ‘in a relationship’ to ‘single’” on my page so I researched a ways to change it without making it public – and I did.

I thought all was good until a guy interested in me called recently and we had the following convo:
Him:  Is that your ex-boyfriend on your FB page?
Me:  Maybe, does he look like my bodyguard?
Him:  Definitely!
Me:  Yes, that’s him.
Him: There are a lot of pics of you and him on your page and it looks like you’re together.  You might want to look into that.
Me: Hmmmmm

So, I had to go through this mental dilemma. Removing the pics of him is removing many of my memories from last year.  However, I am no longer in a relationship and don’t want it to appear that way.  However, he could have untagged his name from the pics but did didn’t (will this offend him?)

In the end, I realized it wasn’t about the ex, it was about me.  I went online and hit the delete, delete, delete button. Who knew we’d have to breakup in so many ways?

Breaking up is hard enough.  What makes breaking up even more difficult is the popularity of Facebook!

M.Y. February 2010

Perfect Valentine’s Day Date

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A Perfect Valentine’s Day Date

Feb10-3It was a lazy Saturday afternoon.  I was curled up in bed taking a pleasant nap.  Then the phone rang.  It wasn’t a number I recognized.  As I said hello, and older woman on the phone told me that her name was Betty and I had signed up to drive her to church on Sunday morning.

Crap, I thought to myself.  I volunteered to help drive people to church.  I received the email several weeks ago with the dates I was supposed to drive – but I never opened it.  I was partially bothered at the call because I had not planned on going to church on Sunday because of something else I had planned.  But as I pouted (in my mind) I continued to listen to Ms. Betty talk about how she doesn’t drive, and how she’ll be 89 in April and how she’s just so thankful that I will be able to drive her to church tomorrow.  I told her I would be proud to drive her to church and took down her address.  Then, I looked through my emails and saw “February 14, Michelle Yeager, Betty” Uggh.

I woke up earlier than normal in order drive to her house, still a little perturbed.  On the way, I decided to make the most of it and stop by Whole Foods where they had some beautiful flowers for sale.  As I pulled up to her house, she was already waiting outside.  I told Ms. Betty she’d have to turn around because I had some tulips for her for Valentine’s Day.  Her face beamed so bright.  You would have thought she won the lottery. She told me how precious I was and we went inside to find a vase.

On the drive to church, Ms. Betty told me that she was one of the founding members of my church.  (I was born and raised in my church so I’ve been there over 30 years).  She told me these amazing stories of when they met at the St. Matthews Women’s Club with the idea of forming a church and the different fundraisers they had.   I became mesmerized by her stories!  She told me past stories of parishioners that I have grown to know and love.

As we pulled into the church she asked if I would mind if we sat together.  I told her of course.  As we walked toward the sanctuary, we both spoke to people we know.  Ms. Betty bragged about me and I told people we were on a Valentine’s date.  After the service I drove her home and she wanted to spend more time talking to me.  She reflected on how grateful she was that I thought of her and spent time with her.   Although I couldn’t stay long (since I did have a real Valentine’s Day date later that day) she made my Valentine’s Day more meaningful than I ever would have imagined.

*On a side note – The Frankie Beverly/Maze and After 7 Concert was off the chain!  People were standing up and dancing in their seats on the main floor and in the balcony.  It was an old school party within a concert. (Now, some people shook a little more than they should have, but I won’t mention any names).  And, I’m sure I’m not the only one that walked out of the concert suddenly realizing that I had to work the next morning – thank goodness for snow days!

M.Y.  February 2010

Snow Stress

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Happy Valentine’s Day to all the lovers, those that believe in love and those seeking love.  Remember love exists in many ways so spend this weekend with the people/things that bring a smile to your face!

Snow Stress

Feb10-2

I have a love/hate relationship with snow.  I love it because it is an amazing sight to see.    To see the glow of the snow in my backyard, especially before it is touched with footprints is simply peaceful.  The way the snow sits on top of branches and rooftops looks like the page out of a perfect storybook.  There is also the joy that my job operates on the school schedule, so when they are out – so am I!

And then there’s my reality – the steep driveway that serves as my sole distraction between me being stuck at home and being reunited with the real world.  It’s not a basic, flat driveway.  This driveway is on an incline. If it’s not shoveled, I will either slide right down it or not be able to get back up it.

On Tuesday we had about six inches of snow. As the garage lifted, I knew I was in for my some major work outside.  I HATE SHOVELING SNOW!!!!! Now living in my childhood home, it’s become an instant thought associated with snow.

As I shoveled the snow this week I started to become very frustrated. I thought to myself, ‘whoever prayed for snow, please tell God you’re satisfied and the snow can stop coming’.  I kept thinking about how much I hated doing this.  Life was just so horrible.

And then I had a flashback – my mother and my father used to shovel this same driveway.  Not once did I ever remember them complaining.  I then remembered one particular snow day.  I moved back home for a couple of years after college and was an elementary school teacher.  My mother had ovarian cancer, and had just had some lymph nodes removed from her neck with surgery.  As I slept in, I heard my various neighbors shoveling their driveways one morning.  When I finally got out of bed, I realized the noise that I heard was my own mother shoveling our driveway.  I remember asking her what she was doing.  Her response was, “I didn’t want you to be late for teaching!”  Here is this woman that was battling cancer and just had a procedure done on her neck and she’s outside shoveling snow for me.

At the remembrance of that memory, I instantly stopped complaining. If she could do that for me, I had no reason to complain about doing it myself.  I also realized that I was blessed because she had purchased the most super-duper snow shovel ever invented.  I don’t have to lean over to pick up snow, it’s large enough to shovel standing up.

By now my complaints seemed juvenile and I instead concentrated on the songs on my Ipod. As I got to the last scoop at the bottom of my driveway, I breathed a sigh of relief.  I looked down my street and saw a family outside.  They had built a large snowman and we admiring their finished product. Tis the season to make memories.  I am glad that my temporary negativity didn’t affect that family from creating a new memory those kids would never forget!

M.Y. February 2010

Age No Limit

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(For Facebook this week you’re supposed to post the pic of a celebrity people say you favor – mine is AJ Johnson from “House Party”, “Inkwell” and “Baby Boy”)
Age No Limit Part II

Feb10-1Research shows that January is the most popular month for divorce.  One of the main reasons is because the holidays are over and people want to start the year with a fresh start.  I have been both dumped and the dumper in the month of January, so although not divorce- I was/am part of the “new beginnings” club.  (I guess it saves some money in February since you don’t  have to splurge on Valentine’s Day gifts that either get eaten (candy) or die (flowers) within 72 hours.

A couple of weeks ago I talked about the dating scene in Louisville and how different it is to date in various age groups.   Being 33 years old, I can attract men in their 20s (it makes me feel like a cougar! LOL) and also men in their 40s (I make them feel like they still got it!).  But as you know- there’s always a story to tell!

Last year my neck was completely locked.  I could move every other body part except my neck.  It wouldn’t turn side to side and all I could do was look forward.  My physical therapist worked wonders, but I still needed a neck brace to help with the recovery.  So, I drove to the Gould’s Medical store in St. Matthews.  The people in there were buying motorized wheelchairs, butt cushions etc..  But in a corner was this sharp, attractive Black male.  As I looked at the brace section, I felt his shadow approach me.  He was in town because his mother was moved out of a nursing home and he was going to care for her at her house.  (Very commendable).

Long story, short – information was exchanged.  Phone calls were had.  A “date” was set up to meet for lunch.  We met at Cunningham’s downtown.  He was funny, but a little too flashy for me.  His phone rings and one of his ‘boys from high school’ is in the area and is going to swing through.  Sure, whatever.  The friend comes in and sits at our table, supposedly they are still the best of friends.  As the two of them are talking, I realize that this guy looks really familiar to me.  I just can’t put my finger on it.
Where do I know this man from?
Ah – and then it clicks.  I stop their conversation and say, “Aren’t you (name of one of my friends) father?”  His eyes grow a little wider.  It reminded me of the Snickers commercial “Awkward!”

Moral of that story – there’s nothing wrong with dating someone older than you, just make sure your friends won’t eventually be calling you mama or daddy!

M.Y.  February 2010