Category Archives: M.Y. Words

Friendly Love?

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Friendly love?

Mar10-4We met two years ago in September 2008 (I’ll call him ‘Guy’). He lives up north.  He liked me.  I liked him.  We got along great.  We took a trip together to a beach.  We survived a hurricane.  A week later he calls.  His ex is moving back to his area and they are going to try to work things out.  My response – Good luck buddy, don’t call me in a month when it doesn’t work out.

He calls. He calls again.  I have no interest in helping him have his cake and eat it to.  I say no phone calls, we can be friends by text or email.  His relationship ends (surprise, surprise).  Months go by.  Christmas arrives.  Tis the season so I say he can call and wish me a happy holiday.  We become friends.  February 2009, he invites me to a Celtics/Lakers game.  Good game.  Good time.  Nothing major chemistry wise.  April arrives.  He expresses an interest.  My response – Sorry buddy, I just got in a relationship.  You had your chance last year.

I stay in the relationship all year.  He and I stay friends.  Boyfriend and I break up end of last year.  He knows this but makes no moves.  I see him end of January 2010 when I go to Boston for a fitness camp.  We have a friendly dinner. No emotions expressed.  I meet a new guy.  Valentine’s Day this year comes around.  New guy and I have an amazing date. Excited to see where it can lead.  ‘Guy’ calls five times that day.  I call back after my date.  ‘Guy’ wants to visit here.  My response – ‘Sorry buddy, I just started dating someone’

‘Guy’ says that I need to give he and I am real chance and he regrets letting me go two years ago. I say ‘your loss’ and keep dating new guy.  ‘Guy’ send flowers to my work that say ‘Just Because’.  I tell guy that I only believe in dating one person at a time and want to see where my current situation could lead.  ‘Guy’ continues to express his emotions.  ‘Guy’ send flowers to me at my competition.  ‘Guy’ flies in to watch my competition. Guy tell me I am the person he is supposed to spend the rest of his life with.  I keep dating new guy.

New guy and I take a mini-food vacation to catch up on everything I missed eating.  ‘Guy’ knows I’m out of town with new guy.  I return to work (this is just last week).  Co-worker walks in and delivers two dozen red roses and an original love poem. The first letter of each poem even spells out my name.  Now I’m put in a very awkward position.
So here are my questions for you – 1. Is it acceptable for someone to make that strong of moves on you even when they know you are dating someone?  2. Should I give ‘Guy’ a chance since he finally came to his senses?  3. Should I stay with new guy since he appreciated me from the beginning?  4. Can I still be friends with this person once he has expressed such strong emotions?  5. Do you believe that everything happens for a reason and if ‘Guy’ and I were meant to be together then timing would have made it happen?  6. What do you say to ‘Guy’ and new guy?

Please email your thoughts, I’ll share what I did next week!

M.Y.  March 2010

A Waffle

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A Waffle

Mar10-3I just love breakfast food.  Pancakes, waffles, omelets, hashbrowns.  Yum, yum, yum!  All of my first meals after competing were very planned out.  I knew breakfast the next morning would be a feast so I planned to go eat at the Rivue atop of Galt House.  And boy, did it not let me down.

If you’ve ever been to Rivue, you know that they have these amazing waffles that seem to melt in your mouth.  With the waffles you can also get these scrumptious made to order omelets.  When my friend and I arrived, we were told that the omelet chef had been working there for over 30 years – good old chef Henry.

My first trip through the omelet/waffle line, I could have cared less about conversation.  It was about me, my waffles and carbs, carbs, carbs.  So after I finished the omelet, the waffles, the fried shrimp, the chicken, the hashbrowns, the cheese quiche, the cheesecake, the peach cobbler and the chocolate cake – I figured I end up a high note and get one more waffle (I know, pity me for this one meal!)

So I walked up to Chef Henry and placed my order.  I told him I heard he’d been there almost 30 years.  He quickly corrected me and said, “No, it’ll be 25 years on March 11″. (Oh, excuse me!)  He went on to tell me that for every five years of service there is a ceremony.  For his 20th anniversary he chose a watch, but for 25 they can get a clock or something else from the catalogue.

He went on to tell me that his father got a clock after his 25th year as a chef and how that was one of the possessions he most treasured once his father passed away.  He thought about getting a clock, but regardless of what he selected, he wanted it to be something that could be passed down to his son (who is a freshman at UK)

Chef Henry then shared with me that he had to give the watch to his son because of the static electricity in his body.  When he wears watches, they either stop on him or start running backward.  It runs in his family and the same thing happened to his mother.

And then the timer went off – Chef Henry gave me two waffles with a smile.  I thanked him for his great conversation and wished him a happy 25th anniversary.  Each and every one of us has a wonderful story to share.  The next time you’re standing in line with someone, why not take the time to get to know just little bit about them.  Although my breakfast was simply wonderful, I left with a smile (and a full stomach) because I knew how special the person was that helped make my moment meaningful!

M.Y.  March 2010

The Ah-nold

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”The Ah-nold”

Mar10-2On Sunday, Monique won an Oscar for her performance in the movie Precious.  During her acceptance speech she said, “Sometimes you have to forgo doing what is popular in order to do what’s right”.  I’ve felt this way the past 12 weeks while getting ready for my last fitness competition.

The competition, The Arnold, was this weekend in Columbus, OH.  Arnold Schwarzenegger was there in full force and there were competitors from many countries around the world.  I knew that not everyone could win, so I prayed to God and set three goals – 1. To bring down my glutes (black women, we know our butts look great in jeans, but we aren’t packing too much muscle),  2. To increase my routine placing (last year it was 7th out of 8) and 3. – to increase my overall placing of fifth from last year.

I was pretty nervous all last week about competing.  All my days of not hanging out with friends, or skipping invites for great meals – would they pay off?  All the many days spent in the gym and in the basement doing cardio – would it be enough?   All the money spent on costumes, travel and prep – would anyone notice?  All the fans and supporters that stood by my side – would I let them down?

The competition was Thursday night.  On Thursday afternoon I went to a MAC store there and had my makeup done.  After my visit with Janelle, I felt absolutely beautiful!  That moment was the first moment that I felt prepared to compete.  I was no longer nervous, I was excited.  I knew as long as I brought my best package to the stage, I would be proud.

My routine went well and I had a cheering section that was heard loudly throughout the arena.  For our two piece round, I wasn’t in the exact middle (which is where the favored person stands).  So ,going home I really had no idea how I would place.

Saturday morning was the awards on the Arnold expo stage in front of thousands of visitors.  The top five in my class were announced and I was one of them.  5th, 4th and 3rd were announced.  That only left two of us.  I felt like a Miss America contestant.  As the announcer said 2nd place, I realized that he did not say my name.  I WON!!  I ACTUALLY WON MY CLASS AT THE ARNOLD!

I was speechless, overjoyed and glanced out in the audience and saw my coach Ceal beaming.  The crowd was actually cheering for me.  I received the winning trophy, me!  I received the jacket – and for that moment, it was my moment to shine.

Dreams do come true.  Goals can be set and accomplished if you stay focused.  Be patient for your time to shine, because it could be just around the corner! (and boy was that Dominos pizza good on the car ride home!)

M.Y. March 2010

Youth Letdown

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Youth Letdown

Mar10-1I am very disappointed in our youth today.  As a former elementary education teacher, I took pride in teaching my young first graders that they could accomplish anything they put their mind to.  I let them know I believed in them and saw some type of potential in each and every one of them.

But now I’m starting to have my doubts.  These past several weeks I have really started to doubt that our youth will amount to anything.  It’s really all pretty pathetic.  It is the year 2010.  Our youth were raised in a generation where their food is ready in five minutes or less.  They can talk to anyone, anywhere in the world with just the click of a button.  Their technology is amazing and there’s an app for everything.

So why in the world are our youth letting our society down?  Aren’t these kids supposed to be the people that will be taking care of me once I get older?  Shouldn’t these kids be the ones to find the cure to cancer or help create a car that flies wherever it goes?  So, what’s the problem?

Here’s my dissatisfaction.  Day after day I have been out driving all year and I’ve noticed these generic, basic creations.  Regardless of the street I was on, they all looked the same.  What I saw where three basic balls of snow stacked on top of each other.  Some may have had two black eyes.  Others had on a basic hat.  Are you serious?  Is that all you can create for a snowman?!  Come on, how uncreative is it? And even more disappointed were the youth that couldn’t even take the time to roll a circle and instead just had a mound of snow and two sticks for arms.  I’m gonna need a little more initiative and creativity.

In the year 2010, snowmen (and women) should be the latest and greatest.  Snowmen should be able to do the moonwalk.  Snow-chef should be able to cook me some pancakes. Heck, with all the technology we have today, there should be a snow-monkey that can shovel my driveway!  Youth, I’m gonna need you to step it up a bit. I mean God gave you several snow days so you can’t complain of lack of time. It was the fourth snowiest winter, so please don’t complain about lack of snow.  Because honestly, there are no excuses!

A wise woman, Whitney Houston, sang “I believe the children are a future, teach them well and let them lead the way”……  Youth, I still believe in you (what I first wrote was pure sarcasm), but it would be nice if you could just think a little outside the box!

M.Y. March 2010

Facebook Update

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Facebook Update

FEb10-4Relationships are hard enough.  What makes relationships even more difficult is the popularity of Facebook!  I remember when I first set up my FB profile – birthday, work location, favorite tv shows etc. Then they asked for status.  At that time I contently checked single.

Then last year I got in a relationship with someone.  I was ecstatic to meet someone that I was compatible with and happy to have a mate.  But, then that awkward conversation came.  No, it wasn’t who would move where.  It wasn’t how long to wait before meeting each other’s family.  It wasn’t even about pressing the toothpaste from the bottom or the middle.  It was about updating our FB status.  Should we?  Shouldn’t we?  Hmmmm….. We finally decided to change our status to “In a relationship” – big things were happening in FB-land.

The congrat messages were posted on my wall.  People wanted to know more information about the guy.  One friend even called and was upset that he had to find out I was in a relationship as opposed to me telling him first!

So, the year carried on and guy and I did some great things together.   Pics of our events were posted on my page.  He was tagged.  I was tagged.  Life was great.

And then we broke up.  When it happened I didn’t go and boast and brag about it to people.  He and I remained friends and continued to talk. But then I realized one thing – I had to change my Facebook status!  I didn’t want everyone to see “Michelle went from ‘in a relationship’ to ‘single’” on my page so I researched a ways to change it without making it public – and I did.

I thought all was good until a guy interested in me called recently and we had the following convo:
Him:  Is that your ex-boyfriend on your FB page?
Me:  Maybe, does he look like my bodyguard?
Him:  Definitely!
Me:  Yes, that’s him.
Him: There are a lot of pics of you and him on your page and it looks like you’re together.  You might want to look into that.
Me: Hmmmmm

So, I had to go through this mental dilemma. Removing the pics of him is removing many of my memories from last year.  However, I am no longer in a relationship and don’t want it to appear that way.  However, he could have untagged his name from the pics but did didn’t (will this offend him?)

In the end, I realized it wasn’t about the ex, it was about me.  I went online and hit the delete, delete, delete button. Who knew we’d have to breakup in so many ways?

Breaking up is hard enough.  What makes breaking up even more difficult is the popularity of Facebook!

M.Y. February 2010

Perfect Valentine’s Day Date

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A Perfect Valentine’s Day Date

Feb10-3It was a lazy Saturday afternoon.  I was curled up in bed taking a pleasant nap.  Then the phone rang.  It wasn’t a number I recognized.  As I said hello, and older woman on the phone told me that her name was Betty and I had signed up to drive her to church on Sunday morning.

Crap, I thought to myself.  I volunteered to help drive people to church.  I received the email several weeks ago with the dates I was supposed to drive – but I never opened it.  I was partially bothered at the call because I had not planned on going to church on Sunday because of something else I had planned.  But as I pouted (in my mind) I continued to listen to Ms. Betty talk about how she doesn’t drive, and how she’ll be 89 in April and how she’s just so thankful that I will be able to drive her to church tomorrow.  I told her I would be proud to drive her to church and took down her address.  Then, I looked through my emails and saw “February 14, Michelle Yeager, Betty” Uggh.

I woke up earlier than normal in order drive to her house, still a little perturbed.  On the way, I decided to make the most of it and stop by Whole Foods where they had some beautiful flowers for sale.  As I pulled up to her house, she was already waiting outside.  I told Ms. Betty she’d have to turn around because I had some tulips for her for Valentine’s Day.  Her face beamed so bright.  You would have thought she won the lottery. She told me how precious I was and we went inside to find a vase.

On the drive to church, Ms. Betty told me that she was one of the founding members of my church.  (I was born and raised in my church so I’ve been there over 30 years).  She told me these amazing stories of when they met at the St. Matthews Women’s Club with the idea of forming a church and the different fundraisers they had.   I became mesmerized by her stories!  She told me past stories of parishioners that I have grown to know and love.

As we pulled into the church she asked if I would mind if we sat together.  I told her of course.  As we walked toward the sanctuary, we both spoke to people we know.  Ms. Betty bragged about me and I told people we were on a Valentine’s date.  After the service I drove her home and she wanted to spend more time talking to me.  She reflected on how grateful she was that I thought of her and spent time with her.   Although I couldn’t stay long (since I did have a real Valentine’s Day date later that day) she made my Valentine’s Day more meaningful than I ever would have imagined.

*On a side note – The Frankie Beverly/Maze and After 7 Concert was off the chain!  People were standing up and dancing in their seats on the main floor and in the balcony.  It was an old school party within a concert. (Now, some people shook a little more than they should have, but I won’t mention any names).  And, I’m sure I’m not the only one that walked out of the concert suddenly realizing that I had to work the next morning – thank goodness for snow days!

M.Y.  February 2010