Monthly Archives: June 2010

Bling Blang Thang

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Bling Blang Thang

June10-4Thanks for all of the great responses on what you would have done in the “ex-bling” situation.  I will admit that it definitely took me off guard since it just came randomly out of the blue.  I had various thoughts run through my head.  The first one was to completely ignore the message since I felt that if he truly wanted it back that he would call and ask me for it.   But, unfortunately, my patience wouldn’t let me go more than an hour without feeling as if I should respond.  Didn’t know how to respond, but I did know that I needed to respond.

I first had to think about the necklace and what value it had to me.  I haven’t worn the necklace all year.  I don’t even think about it.  It’s tucked away in the back of a drawer.  It was a very nice gesture on his part while we were together, but I really feel zero sentimental value to it.  However, it was appraised for several hundred dollars and several weeks ago I had considered pawning it so I could upgrade some other jewelry.   I also realized that the way he treated this situation was the way he reacted in other situations in our relationship, which is why I knew he wasn’t my end all be all.

Now, I will admit that, like everyone else, I am no angel.  If you catch me on a day that I have little carbs in my system, I take no responsibility for what I say.  Unfortunately, he caught me on one of those days.  I emailed him the following:   “Right after we broke up I met this amazing guy. I didn’t want to give him a chance because it was ‘too soon’. But I gave it a chance and found how true love should feel.  I found a relationship full of love and void of petty actions.  I don’t know what our future holds, but I enjoy each day he and I spend together. We are headed out of town and then I have a competition. Once I get settled again, I can search for the chain and mail it to you.”  And that was that.

The real ironic thing about the entire situation is that this year for my birthday I received a bracelet from my current boyfriend.  It was too big so he had to have some links removed.  The day he got the bracelet back, was the day I received the email from the “ex”.  Since I tell him any and everything, I shared the story with him.  We both laughed about it.  He assured me that his present was a permanent gift and there was no return policy whatsoever. The only thing I had to do was ‘handle with care’.  Sometimes you just need small reminders to value the treasure the sits in front of you.  Love is definitely more valuable than silver, gold or diamonds.

M.Y. June 2010

Ex-Bling

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Ex-Bling

June-10-3Our birthdays were 10 days apart so we celebrated together.  We exchanged presents.  I received a pink diamond necklace.  He said he bought it several years ago while in Australia and saved it for the person he wanted to spend the rest of his life with – me!

That was June 2009.  We broke up just as 2010 started.  We stayed cordial with each other.  I waited to see if he would ask for the necklace back.  He never did.   Our birthdays come around again this year.  He sends me a “Happy BDay” text on mine.  Although I missed his actual day, I went on Facebook to post a “Happy Belated Bday” message on his wall. But my access was blocked.  I was listed as a friend, I just couldn’t post on his page like his other friends could.

So, I sent a FB email – “Just wanted to wish you a happy 40th birthday.  I was going to post it on your FB page but you’ve blocked me.”  His response – “Thanks.”  I wasn’t sure why he’d block me, especially since I left the relationship, but just felt that it would be best to just ‘unfriend’ him since for some reason he felt some conflict.  I didn’t send him an email or anything, just unchecked a button.

Next day I receive the following message – “Can you send me my chain back?  Especially since we know you are not “the one” and that is the circumstance which I gave it to under. Thanks for the de-friend as well.”

I found the message very interesting.  It’s been over six months and not once had he even thought once about the necklace.  Now this message comes out of nowhere.  So here’s my question to you – how would you respond?
1. Ignore his message and keep the necklace
2. Reply back, “I see turning 40 didn’t make you more mature”
3.  Just send it back
4. Tell him I gave it to my boyfriend’s mother
5. Pawn it and spend the money on a shopping spree
6. Tell him if he wants it, he’ll need to fly to Louisville and get it
7. Ask why all of sudden he wants it back
8. Other

Tell me both what you WOULD do and what you SHOULD do (not necessarily always the same answer).  Should you return all gifts after a breakup or is jewelry a special exception? Like with a previous scenario, I’ve already acted on the situation but am very curious how others would have handled it.

M.Y.  June 2010

Bull’s Eye

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Bull’s Eye

June10-2I have a bull’s eye on me.  It’s right smack in the middle of my forehead.  I didn’t realize it was there at first.

When I first started competing, I researched competitors to see the skills that I’d be up against.  I remember being intimidated by certain people, like Allison Ethier.  I just wanted to represent myself well.

Last year when I went to my first national fitness competition (in Charleston, SC) nobody could have cared who I was.  I was a skinny, black girl that stayed to herself backstage.  I didn’t work with one of the powerhouse trainers.  I was just Michelle Yeager from Kentucky.  Out of six women in my class, I finished third.  I was pleased, determined to come back stronger for the next one.

Then September came, and my next competition was in NY, NY. I had a better routine and worked on my physique.  This time when I showed up, I was a familiar face.  I was a friendly face.  People remembered me from the last show, but still didn’t think too much about me being there.  Out of 10 competitors in my class, I finished third.  The top two turned professional.  Just one spot away.  I received compliments on my routine and was told that my glutes were holding me back.  (I’m a black woman – what do you expect?!)

Then came the Arnold this past March.  Instant international exposure.  While I was waiting backstage to compete, a competitor said,” I Googled your routine, it was awesome.”  Various people were interviewing me.  And, I won my class!  Great, great feeling.  I was on a high for several weeks.  Then I realized – I’M NOW THE PERSON TO BEAT!

I’m at the top with the expectation of turning pro this year. And as exciting as that is, the stress is just as tremendous.  I’m expected to bring a powerful routine, one that will have folks talking.  The judges are looking for my glutes to be smaller than before.  It’s go big or go home!

So, I have two chances – June 18/19 in Chicago (where I have to win my class) and then July 9/10 in New Jersey (where the top 2 go pro).  I want to go pro.  However, I know all things happen for a reason and that when it’s my time to shine – it will. The smell of success is at arms length away ….. and it smells just like pizza!

M.Y. June 2010

Happy? Birthday

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Happy? Birthday

June10-1Last week, on May 26, I celebrated another birthday.  I turned 34.  Now usually a new birthday doesn’t affect me too much.  But for some reason, this year was different. I woke up with back pains and I was more tired than usual.  I quickly made an appointment with my chiropractor, but felt if this was the way 34 would be, then  I needed to roll back over and just stay 33.  I then realized that I would be 35 next year which is just one more stepping stone closer to 40.  I’M GETTING OLD.  I’M FEELING OLD.  Ahhhhh!

From there my mind came to the realization that my plan to be married with kids by 30 didn’t come true.  Although there is great potential that those things are in the works, the reality is that they don’t currently exist.  So, while last Wednesday should have been a Happy day, it started in a funk.

As I started thinking about it, though, I realized that everything I saw as a negative, really was a positive.  I woke up sore, because for the past couple of weeks I’ve been practicing my next fitness routine.  I do back tucks and one-arm pushups.  I should be grateful that God has blessed me with those skills and still provides me the strength to do them!

There’s a reason I’m not currently married.  My mother had cancer for five years.  During that time, she became the most important person in my life.  I was in a relationship – with her. God needed me to be there as her support system and I cherish those times we spent together.   She taught me a lot of life lessons that I now can manifest into a marriage.

Kids – I love kids.  I taught 24 every year.  And then, I was able to send them home on the school bus.  God gave me the time and freedom to travel whenever and wherever my heart desired.  Last year I took 15 trips – fifteen!  I have been able to follow my passions , create my dreams and just be me.

I realized that all of our paths are different.  And while mine might not have been the one I planned or “thought” I wanted, it was the one specially designed for me.  I’ve accomplished some amazing things, met some tremendous people and been given some splendid opportunities.   I’m proud of who I am at 34 and can’t wait to see where God will lead me into 35!

M.Y. June 2010