Bling Blang Thang

Bling Blang Thang

June10-4Thanks for all of the great responses on what you would have done in the “ex-bling” situation.  I will admit that it definitely took me off guard since it just came randomly out of the blue.  I had various thoughts run through my head.  The first one was to completely ignore the message since I felt that if he truly wanted it back that he would call and ask me for it.   But, unfortunately, my patience wouldn’t let me go more than an hour without feeling as if I should respond.  Didn’t know how to respond, but I did know that I needed to respond.

I first had to think about the necklace and what value it had to me.  I haven’t worn the necklace all year.  I don’t even think about it.  It’s tucked away in the back of a drawer.  It was a very nice gesture on his part while we were together, but I really feel zero sentimental value to it.  However, it was appraised for several hundred dollars and several weeks ago I had considered pawning it so I could upgrade some other jewelry.   I also realized that the way he treated this situation was the way he reacted in other situations in our relationship, which is why I knew he wasn’t my end all be all.

Now, I will admit that, like everyone else, I am no angel.  If you catch me on a day that I have little carbs in my system, I take no responsibility for what I say.  Unfortunately, he caught me on one of those days.  I emailed him the following:   “Right after we broke up I met this amazing guy. I didn’t want to give him a chance because it was ‘too soon’. But I gave it a chance and found how true love should feel.  I found a relationship full of love and void of petty actions.  I don’t know what our future holds, but I enjoy each day he and I spend together. We are headed out of town and then I have a competition. Once I get settled again, I can search for the chain and mail it to you.”  And that was that.

The real ironic thing about the entire situation is that this year for my birthday I received a bracelet from my current boyfriend.  It was too big so he had to have some links removed.  The day he got the bracelet back, was the day I received the email from the “ex”.  Since I tell him any and everything, I shared the story with him.  We both laughed about it.  He assured me that his present was a permanent gift and there was no return policy whatsoever. The only thing I had to do was ‘handle with care’.  Sometimes you just need small reminders to value the treasure the sits in front of you.  Love is definitely more valuable than silver, gold or diamonds.

M.Y. June 2010



June-10-3Our birthdays were 10 days apart so we celebrated together.  We exchanged presents.  I received a pink diamond necklace.  He said he bought it several years ago while in Australia and saved it for the person he wanted to spend the rest of his life with – me!

That was June 2009.  We broke up just as 2010 started.  We stayed cordial with each other.  I waited to see if he would ask for the necklace back.  He never did.   Our birthdays come around again this year.  He sends me a “Happy BDay” text on mine.  Although I missed his actual day, I went on Facebook to post a “Happy Belated Bday” message on his wall. But my access was blocked.  I was listed as a friend, I just couldn’t post on his page like his other friends could.

So, I sent a FB email – “Just wanted to wish you a happy 40th birthday.  I was going to post it on your FB page but you’ve blocked me.”  His response – “Thanks.”  I wasn’t sure why he’d block me, especially since I left the relationship, but just felt that it would be best to just ‘unfriend’ him since for some reason he felt some conflict.  I didn’t send him an email or anything, just unchecked a button.

Next day I receive the following message – “Can you send me my chain back?  Especially since we know you are not “the one” and that is the circumstance which I gave it to under. Thanks for the de-friend as well.”

I found the message very interesting.  It’s been over six months and not once had he even thought once about the necklace.  Now this message comes out of nowhere.  So here’s my question to you – how would you respond?
1. Ignore his message and keep the necklace
2. Reply back, “I see turning 40 didn’t make you more mature”
3.  Just send it back
4. Tell him I gave it to my boyfriend’s mother
5. Pawn it and spend the money on a shopping spree
6. Tell him if he wants it, he’ll need to fly to Louisville and get it
7. Ask why all of sudden he wants it back
8. Other

Tell me both what you WOULD do and what you SHOULD do (not necessarily always the same answer).  Should you return all gifts after a breakup or is jewelry a special exception? Like with a previous scenario, I’ve already acted on the situation but am very curious how others would have handled it.

M.Y.  June 2010