Monthly Archives: July 2012

You Just Know

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 You Just Know  

 I went in for my six week post-pregnancy checkup with my OB-GYN.  It was the typical checkup like I would receive at my yearly exam (don’t worry, I won’t go into those details).  Everything went fine.

She talked about how she and her husband went to Vegas to watch a Cirque Show and once of the dancers looked as if she could be pregnant.  She said they talked about it and her husband said he didn’t think the female was pregnant because all the weight was in her belly and that’s not possible.  My doctor said she thought about me and said that it was possible because that’s where all of my weight was.  I was flattered to hear her say that (but also know she must not have gotten a good look at me while preggo because my hips s.p.r.e.a.d!)

Anyway, she asked if I was interested in having another baby. Say what?!  I just popped out baby number one.  Can’t baby #1 have his first tooth appear before we have this conversation? Honestly, though, I did understand her reason for asking and told her I didn’t know.  She talked about how this one was a high risk pregnancy and the course of action she’s take if Milton and I became pregnant again.

She then looked at me seriously and said “The thing that really scared me about you is that your condition would not have shown up on any tests.  It’s a good thing you know your body.  YOU saved your baby!” 
I saved my baby.  What powerful words those are.  Especially when she says it and both of us look down at sweet Maximus.  I saved my baby.  Yes, those months of bed rest were worth it, but more importantly – I listened to my body.  I think about how often we listen to any and everyone around and often question ourselves.  Whether its relationship or career advice, we let our single friends steer us wrong and our jobless friends prevent us from taking a job that might not seem ideal. Why do we feel everyone else knows what is better for us?  And why do we depend so often on the wrong people to reach out to?

Maybe it’s time to listen to yourself and follow your own lead.  Will you always make the right decision? Of course not.  Will everyone always agree? Heck no.  But at least take the time to listen to yourself as you take time to listen to others.  I listened to my body and saved my child’s life so listen to your body and follow your heart. You might just save your own life.

First Kiss

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   First Kiss

You always remember your first kiss, especially if it’s a special one.  I recently had one of those moments.

A little over 36 years ago I was born. And while I think it was a special day, not too many people outside of my parents seems to remember or boast about it.  Not too many people reminisce about my born day – except for Mr. Siegfreidt.  He loves to tell people that he came to the hospital on the day I was born.  Even 36 years later he is proud of that memory.

Mr. Siegfreidt and I attend the same church, St. Matthews Episcopal.  And ever since I can remember, he’s always given me a kiss each and every Sunday.  He always sits in the same front pew, greets me with a warm smile and a kiss on the cheek.  Although his movements have become slower over time and his hair much more gray, I can tell how much it means to him to see me smile his way in passing.

He’s been married 62 years but the past couple of years his wife’s health has declined. You could tell it was a struggle for the two of them to come to church together and then a couple of months ago they just randomly stopped attending.  It was just a couple of weeks before I went on bed rest.  It was odd to look in his pew and not see him there. He said his wife was no longer at a point where she could come to church and they were both now going to the service at the nursing home where they now lived.

I was so excited to go to church with Maximus so that my church family could meet him and they were overjoyed.  But, there was one person I know was disappointed not to be a part of that moment – Mr. Siegfreidt.  Well, last weekend Milton, Maximus and I finally made to the nursing home so Mr. Siegfreidt could meet Maximus.  Once again his face lit up at the sight of seeing us.  He was so proud to see that I was a mother and even more excited to hold Maximus.

But the moment I will remember most (actually I’ll probably never forget) was right before we left, he held Maximus tight and gave him a kiss.  The kiss I looked forward to every Sunday for 36 years, was now being passed down to my son – priceless!!

I Now Understand

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 I Now Understand

I used to be in an all women’s investment club. We called ourselves S.T.A.F.F. (Sisters Together Achieving Financial Freedom). Our group met monthly for over 10 years and we saw various members get married, move away and start a family.  I left the group at the beginning of the year in 2011.  And one thing I was known for with the group was always being on time.  If the meeting started at 7:00pm, you can believe I was there by 7:00pm.  Often times I would be the only person there for 10-15 minutes.  The running joke was that if I left my house at the start time for the meeting, I’d get there around the same time as everyone else.

It wasn’t until yesterday that I understood what was going on.  Yesterday Maximus, at the ripe age of five weeks old, was asked to film a newborn video that would be shown in hospitals to new mothers.  He was going to be paid a savings bond and filming started at noon.

To me that seemed like plenty of time to get things done, but little did I know that being on baby/youth time is different than single/independent woman time.  It first started with a baby that did not want to be put down.  Morning time is usually snuggle time and this day was no different.  Usually that’s fine, but not when you’re praying that at least one dress fits over my now wider hips and it’s more difficult to do when lil man is in your arms.  Then comes getting Maximus dressed. Usually that’s pretty simple, but now I must time it so that he doesn’t puke or poo on his clothes since he’ll be filmed.

Which leads to breast feeding. I tried to time it just right so that eating would be the last thing we did before leaving the house.  All seemed to go well and I thought I would still be on time – until I realized I couldn’t find the black dress I had picked out to wear.  It’s a simple black dress, it couldn’t be in too many places.  I looked high and low and couldn’t find it.  Maximus wasn’t much help.  I found a less pleasant dress to throw on. As I was getting ready to walk downstairs, I remembered I’d put the dress in the dryer to get out the wrinkles – and there it was.

We were finally on our way.  While I would love to say I was 10-15 minutes late, we were actually still on time.  BUT, I can now completely relate to my friends being late places and having a million things to do before one simple task can be complete.

It feels great to now be a part of this not so secret parent society where most people speak the same language. I’m not the president or the founder.  I’m just a rookie member starting to learn the ropes. Go team!

Timing is Everything

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 Timing IS Everything

Father’s Day (6/17) – Milton and I go out to eat for the first time since bed rest and I notice my car has hail damage.

Monday (6/18) – I call State Farm and set up an appointment for the hail assessment.

Friday – I go to the easy process and receive a check for my hail damage.

Tuesday (6/26) – Maximus and I go to the my preferred Repair Shop and they say it’ll be close to the end of August before they can get to my car. I say “No problem, my car still drives so it’s no big deal.” They say I have a great attitude and everyone is not that positive.

Wednesday (very next day) – They call back and say one of their repairs were canceled, they went through the 50 jobs waiting to be done and mine seemed like the easiest to do (talk about timing!).  They asked if I could come in the next day.  (Uh – YEAH)

Thursday – I drop my car off there and Enterprise picks me up to get a rental car since they say it could take a week.  I end up with a Camry.  I absolutely LOVE the Camry, the way it rides and space for baby.

Friday (6/29)- Repair Shop calls back saying my car finished (say what?!).  I pick up my BMW.    Milton now as a renewed interested in getting a new car for him (we’ve been looking into it for five months).

Saturday (6/30) – We drive to to Sam Swope and work with Lamont Chandler and Shawn Garner. We were told Sunday was going to be considered end of month so it was a great time make a deal before the weekend was over.

Saturday night – While looking online to determine which car to get, Milton happens upon a great end of month deal (a really great deal) at a dealership out of town.

Sunday – We call to see if Sam Swope can match the price.  They say yes. We leave with a cool Camry.  I shed a fake tear. We traded in my “dream” car that I’d had since 2006 so that Milton could have his “dream” family car to drive to Fort Knox.  Everything seemed to fall into place so I knew it was the right thing to do. DRIVE ON!

Lesson: Some time you have to survive the damage to the storm in order to reap the benefits and see the beautiful rainbow.