I’s Married Now

I’s Married Now!

May 11-3The week leading up to the wedding there was plenty of flooding and tornado warnings.  I worried that my wedding day would be the same. Saturday, April 30 had perfect weather.  The day before all of the bridal party arrived.  All of the groomsmen drove in from out of town. One ran out of gas 30 miles outside of Louisville – and left his wallet in Indy.  Not good.  One of my relatives drove 10 hours to the wedding, but never bothered to tell me he was coming.  Let the stress begin.

I had to ask Milton for one day not to have the open relationship that we have where we talk about everything.  If something went wrong on our wedding day, I preferred to be out of the loop. The rehearsal and rehearsal dinner went well.  I enjoyed bonding with my three bridesmaids after everyone else left.

Wedding day starts at 8:00am with my hair. Followed at 11:00am with makeup.  We arrived at The Grand in New Albany at 1:30 to take pictures.  First pics/video were of me getting ready.  Then, Milton and I had our “First Look”.  This is a time when only he and I are in a room together.  His back is to me as I walk down the aisle and then he turns around.  It was a golden moment.  We then all take all group photos.

I wasn’t nervous for the entire day, except for one moment – our guests were in their seats, the bridal party was downstairs and I was alone upstairs waiting to come down. At the top of the stairs I could see the back of Milton’s head in the mirror.  The reality of it all set it.  I walk into the room surrounded by all of our family and friends and all of the attention is on me.  I see Milton in the distance wiping his eye and all I want to do is be by his side.

We tried to make the ceremony and reception personal and meaningful.  During our first dance (to Luther’s So Amazing), Milton and I recorded messages to each other that played over the song.  We also did this with the mother/son and bride/uncles dance.

I did a dress change (yes, there were two wedding dresses) and was made a Kappa sweetheart by Milton’s fraternity.  We cut the cake, did the Electric Slide and took plenty of photos. My one and only regret was that I didn’t get to speak to many of the guests there.  But, I hope they know how much I appreciate them.
At the wedding we also announced where we would be living for Milton’s first two years in the JAG – not Germany, not Hawaii, not Ft. Bragg.  We are headed to Fort Knox!!!!!  Because Milton took the bar in IN, he couldn’t live in that state – however KY was fair game. We’d like to start a family and would love to be around friends and family as we go through that transition.  So, I’ll be here.  Milton will be here. The only thing that will change is my last name!

A License To Wed

A License to Wed

Apr 11-2Slowly but surely all of the wedding details are coming together.  One of the wedding horror stories you hear from couples is that they forgot to get their wedding license.  So Milton and I planned several weeks out to go and get it.

We had originally planned to get our license the day after I gave my speech since Milton was going to be in town.  He had done the research.  Since we are getting married right across the bridge, he went online to see what we would need.

We woke up that morning and I re-asked Milton if I needed a birth certificate or social security card.  He called and asked them but they said all that was needed was a driver’s license.  HOWEVER, they told Milton that because he lives in Indianapolis, we would have to get our marriage license in Indianapolis.
Which means a new trip needed to be planned!  We planned a lunch date/marriage license get together.  The process was very simple – show you driver’s license, pay your money and fill out a form.  Most of the information was typical but then they asked the following questions:

Have you ever been adjudged to be out of unsound mind?  If yes, has the adjudication been removed?

Are you related to the male applicant closer than second cousin?

Are you now under the influence of an alcoholic beverage?

Ar you now under the influence of a narcotic drug?
Luckily I passed the question with flying colors – and so did Milton. When asked if either of us had been married before or if we had kids, I am proud to say that no unknown love children or women from the past emerged.

Wedding dress – check.  Marriage license – check.  Shellin’ out a lot of money for everything else – check!!!  Let the countdown begin – 10….. 9 (wait stop right there)!  Nine more days…

April 2011

Wedding Dress Drama

Wedding Dress Drama

Apr 11-3When you have less than six months to plan a wedding, everything must be done at a rapid pace.  The location, photographers, wedding cake – everything had to be locked into place pretty early on because most of them were already booked for an event.

When I first went wedding dress shopping, each location would tell me that I needed to order the dress ASAP to ensure I would receive it on time.  Time was definitely of the essence.  I drove to each bridal store in Louisville.  I found the dress I thought I wanted. On Election Day 2010, I also stopped by The Bridal Suite of Louisville.  They had a rack of dresses deeply discounted on sale for $100.  One of the sale dresses was the same dress I wanted at the other store – at a MUCH cheaper price.  I left the store to think about the purchase, but Milton said I needed to go back in and buy it.  It was a deal I couldn’t beat.

Fast forward to last week.   I had dropped my dress off to be fitted and the day had come to pick it back up.   I was excited to see it, but nervous to see if she (we’ll call her SH) could make the correct alterations.   I was also a little set off by the alterations lady because she asked to be paid in cash.   Because of that, I arrived with a chip on my shoulder.  As I arrived at her house, her husband was working in the garage.  He asked if SH was supposed to meet me.  I said yes.
SH wasn’t there.  She thought my 11:00am appointment was at 5:00pm.  She said she’d be there in 15 minutes.  So now the chip on my shoulders has become a boulder.  She lived in a different end of town and I’d driven 25 minutes to get there.  I start doubting SH and tell myself I should have worked with someone else.  She pulls into the  driveway 16 minutes later and we walk into her basement.  I put on my half smile and try on the dress.  My half smile turns into a beaming smile as I realize that she did a great job taking it in and tweaking it!

Any doubt, negative views or issues that I had with SH were overshadowed by her amazing work at a very reasonable price.  I left a happy bride-to-be.  Operation wedding countdown – 16 days!

April 2011

Wedding/Funeral

Wedding/Funeral

Feb 11-2There’s one relative that I am much closer to than all of the others.  When I have problems, she’s the person I call.    When Milton was going to propose to me, she is the person he called.  When I was trying to decide on a wedding dress, I took video of the dresses and she helped me make the decision.  When I walk down the aisle, I wanted my Aunt Cheryl by my side.

While at UNC I would spend every Thanksgiving at her house instead of traveling home.  My senior year, in 1997, Aunt Cheryl had a heart transplant.  I remember being ‘mad’ at her that year because they left me alone for Thanksgiving.  The transplant was supposed to give her 4-6 extra years of life.  But that was 13 years ago.  Whenever I could, I would travel to see her.  She started dialysis a couple of years ago.  She enjoyed reading National Enquirer to pass the time.  So I ordered a subscription.

Milton and I were in North Carolina in December to see her.  Milton told me that he wanted us to have the same type of fun loving relationship that my aunt and uncle had.  When I returned home, she called me and said she has never seen me so happy before.  She was excited for my wedding.

Recently I was getting my hair done and had a feeling of sadness run through me.  I didn’t know what it was.  A couple hours later I receive a phone call from my uncle.  My aunt had to be resuscitated three times and it wasn’t looking good.  At first I thought about flying down to say goodbye, but I didn’t want to have the last vision my aunt unresponsive and attached to all types of responses.  The next day she died.

It was difficult because the motherly figure in place of my own mother was now gone.  It was difficult because I knew how excited she was to see me get married.  It was most difficult because instead of her traveling to see me get married, I was traveling to attend her funeral.  I knew she was in a better place and the pains and illnesses she’d felt for a long amount of time were gone.  I truly believe that things happen for a reason.  I also know that she will have a back row (my parents will have the front row) seat to my wedding and all will be smiling down from above.

M.Y. February 2011