“Confession of Love”

“I know you’re trying to figure out what in the world possessed me to write this letter, right?  Well I’ve been sitting around for the past several weeks thinking of a number of things, number one of which has been me.  I guess you could say I’ve been taking a good hard look at myself.  The surprising thing that I’ve discovered about myself is that I’ve been a somewhat destructive individual over the past 29 years.  Destructive in the sense that I’ve always looked out for (me) – and as a result, I’ve hurt a number of individuals who have been very dear to me.  I’ve also discovered that I am in love with you.  I know that latter statement comes as a shock to you.  However, that was the manner in which it was intended.  I know you’re wondering why I’ve chosen this particular method and tell you this- it’s quite simple.

You see-I fear being rejected, so therefore if I start anew the pain may not be as great as it would if I were to go all out and try to win you over.  During the past several weeks I’ve been tempted to call you a number of times.  However, I always backed down.  This letter has been in the works for a number of weeks.  However, tonight I decided to go ahead and let you know how I felt.  I’ve shocked you once so let me do it again.  I would marry you tomorrow if you felt I was worthy of you.  I do not say this jokingly.  If you think back several years ago, I’m sure that you will discern that I never used the words ‘love’ or ‘marriage’ in any of our conversations, and in order for me to use these words has taken a great deal of soul searching on my part.  I know I’ve caused you to begin to think of yourself in the future.  I ask that you also think of me in the process. ” Love, Steve

*This is a love letter that I found in my house from my father to my mother written in 1971. They met in college while attending Tuskegee University (class of ’64).  They did not date during undergrad.  My mother went back several years after graduation to visit her younger brother who was a student at Tuskegee.  My father was over the dorms where my uncle lived and during a visit my parents became reacquainted and began a long distance relationship.  At the time the letter was written, my parents were not together, but my father realized he almost let a good thing get away!  Happy Valentine’s Day!!!

M.Y.  February 2008