I Think I am Old

Sometimes I think about something, and then I say it out loud, and then I tell other people, and then they are excited….. and then I wonder what in the world did I get myself into?

Well, that’s about how I feel right now.  I had an urge to compete, and I scratched it. But after going ‘public’ with the news, I have doubts on whether I can succeed.  I was always a fitness and/or figure competitor, but now I’ll be doing bikini.  Do 37 year old women really look good in bikinis?  Do the poses we’re supposed to do look goofy instead of sexy? Can I proudly poke out my booty?  Can I go without my favorite foods for nine weeks?

I told my doubts to my husband, trainer and some of my Facebook friends.  They were all very supportive and pretty much said to go for it. Many thought I was in great shape already.  Little did people know that they are the ones who have inspired me.  I’ve watched several of my mom friends go below 200 pounds for the first time since being pregnant.  I’ve watched my husband earn his I LOST IT shirt in a little over a month. I watched other friends compete in their first competition.

They motivated me, so now I want to help motivate them. Today was my first day of workouts.  And I’m sure if I cussed, I would have cussed my heart out.  It was hard and I was exhausted.  Milton and I also did cardio sprints tonight.  I so wanted to give up.  My poor little legs could barely sprint. But he pumped me up and encouraged me to keep going.  And I love him for that!  So, please say a prayer for me.  My success is in my hands.

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