Oh So Painful

I never, ever, ever want to wake up again and feel the type of pain I recently felt.  It felt like brick was trying to push it’s way out of the hole in my behind, but it just wasn’t going to give way.  Talk about pain.  Although I haven’t been in labor yet, it definitely felt like labor on my backside!

It hurt to walk to the toilet.  It hurt to sit on the toilet.  I had to stop several times to make it downstairs.  After drinking a glass of water and eating some raisins, I tried to make my way into the downstairs bathroom. Slowly I sat on the commode.  Owwwwww!  I tried to push, but it hurt so much.  I started sweating.  I did lamaze breaths that I’ve seen on tv.  I turned on the fan in the bathroom. Nothing seemed to be working.

After about five minutes, the clouds in the sky parted and I felt the most exhilarating feeling in the world.  I never knew taking a dump would be such a freeing and refreshing feeling… ahhhhhh!

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