The Ex-Factor

My ex-boyfriend and I had not seen each other since we broke up in January.  We had a rather nasty argument the weekend we broke up.  Although I’m the type of person that likes to try to make amends, talk things out and end on a good note, he felt it was better if we ceased all communication.  He pretty much said if we are in the same location don’t even bother to acknowledge his existence.  The lack of closure and communication did weigh on my mind for some time, but I came to the realization that I control my own happiness.

I was at a party last weekend and saw the ex’s car drive by.  I feel my body tense up.  ‘There’s my ex’s car.  I need to leave!’  I didn’t realize I said it out loud.  It had been nine months since I had seen this guy.  It had been rumored that he was dating this girl that I didn’t care for and I didn’t know what to expect.  I knew I looked good that night and also knew enough men in the party to make him jealous (if needed).

My heart started beating faster as I saw him walk in and talk to his fraternity brothers.  I watched him for awhile and still wasn’t sure if I we would communicate or if I would kick him in the shins and run.  I decided to take a chance.  I walked up behind him, put my hand on the small of his back and said ‘Hello!’ He turned around with a smile and from then on I knew everything would be fine.

Talking to him made me remember the reasons I value and care for him as a person (although we will never see things the same).  We didn’t discuss our past relationship, but I felt a great sense of closure.  Regardless of the arguments we had or the three grey hairs that he caused, I was glad that our paths intersected.  And now I can exhale!

M.Y.  September 2007